Everything in the world is judged; from appearances, the way
someone talks, and choices made by others.
There is not one thing I can personally think of that is not
judged. So when all this judgment is
going around there is a hidden affects that are not always noticed. For example: reflected appraisal, our
perception of another’s view of ourselves. (Wood, J. T. 2010). Wood, J. T.
(2010). Reflected appraisal starts from the day you are born until the day you
die, with either a good or bad effect to our self-concept. I have had success with this subject, but
with everything done in life, there is always room for improvement.
Through the reflected appraisal process some come to believe that
they are the way others are telling them.
Like a mirror effect, how others see us we see as well. (Wood, J. T.
2010) In this case, if someone was to
tell another person they did great at their presentation in class. The effect would be that person feeling smart
and proud of their work. I believe I
have made great success with this topic of reflected appraisal because I am
always trying to make someone else feel good about themselves and up lift
them. I was not always treated kindly in
school and took in the “treat others how you want to be treated” saying. While I might have made great success of this
topic I do have my faults.
There are three phases that go through someone’s mind as they
think of their self-concept. (Cooley, n.d)
To begin one looks at how others see them. Second one visualizes how others evaluate
them. The last phase is they come to a
conclusion that is either good or bad about their self-concept. How I am trying to improve myself is I keep
in mind even if someone seems to not think this deeply about their
self-concept, they do, and it should not be my job to bring someone down. I am in the category of an upper; someone who
reflects positive appraisal of self-worth. (Wood, J. T. 2010) Although this is obviously something everyone
does, the terms and concepts of it all is not known by many people. I want to share this because it opened my
eyes and can open many more.
By giving others information about reflected appraisal I believe
it can help them live a more positive life.
Many have a set reflected appraisal that could have been from a long
time ago but still believe they are in that said category. Let’s say one was called dumb in school from
elementary to middle school. They have
had that set label for so long that even when they get into high school and
finally start to prove themselves, they still believe they are seen as
dumb. They end up having no
confidence. Someone’s faults should be
accepted but encouraged to work on. The
influence of everyone around you can be harsh, with reflected appraisal known,
it will be better to overcome and flourish.
Judgment is passed where ever you go, from appearances, the way
someone talks, and choices made by others.
In the end, you are left with yourself and your own opinions to flutter
through your mind, so why let someone else put those opinions there for
you? Reflected appraisal might be an
obstacle for some, but a challenge for many who know nothing of it. Just remember to be who you want to be and to
keep in mind reflected appraisal can affect everyone.
References
Wood, J. T. (2010). In
Interpersonal communication: Everyday encounters. Boston, MA: Wadsworth,
Cengage Learning.
Cooley, C. H. (n.d.).
What Is Reflected Appraisal? wiseGEEK: clear answers for common questions.
Retrieved October 26, 2012, from
http://www.wisegeek.com/what-is-reflected-appraisal.htm
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